Reality check

Wafa’s post struck a chord in me… i mentioned before that no one had any influence or bearing on who i am, however at a certain time in the past few years, i looked for validation. I trusted few in my life, i opened up to them, NOUB and Red are of the few that i trusted, however, i never really looked for validation from them, they are close to me, but still, the thought of validation was somehow needed to be from an outsider.

I found this person, the mother of my lost best friend, she was barely old, wise, highly educated, enlightened, open minded and beautiful. She knows the right ways of the old, embraced the ways of the young. my discovery was late and lasted for a short time, she went to the other side after a brave battle against cancer.

Whenever i was restless, and i needed some validation over some decisions that i made, or a reality check, i know i would find her, she would kick my ass if i was doing something wrong, and encourage me if i was on the right track.

I never looked for validation since then, i never REALLY searched for a validator ever since, and whenever i saw a prospect validator, (s)he failed in comparison.

Everyone needs a reality check every once in a while, and as much as you think you know yourself, an outsider would give you a view that may align with what you know about yourself, and/or gives you a new perspective that you never saw/knew.

I miss her, I miss her foresight. I don’t belive in the concept of heaven and hell, but if heaven really exists, I know you are there!

I need a reality check, and as Wafa’s post says: it’s time to let go.

Doomish:
Brave, Courageous and bold.
Long live his fame,
and long live his glory.
Long may his worthless posts be told.

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3 Comments

  1. Red

    I’m speechless but I would like to send a hug on this special day! You are a very special human! And it scares me to think of any possibility of not getting ur support & validatiion!

    Reply

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