Where is Home?

Every day i write stories for the newspaper, i have a guideline that i must follow when i am writing, however when i come to this dark blog, i lose those guidelines, and my sentences are shorter and mainly not connected, this post is 2 parts, the original blog post and the newspaper style. here we go:

Newspaper style with no editor to check my mistakes or do the required edits.

UAE// News reporter shrouded in grief and dismay after a short visit back to his home country.

The news reporter felt that he lost all traces of him ever exsisting at his home country, after his family took over his apartment and carried out maintenance and changed most of its decorations.

Doomish as he is known, travelled back on the 9th of february in a surprise visit to his parents, the visit came after spending several months in the UAE after he joined a major english newspaper. 

The plane landed at midnight and the reporter was greeted by his brother, both of them enjoyed a slow ride home, the brother offered the fatigued plagued brother a bottle of water and generously stopped on the way home for a few minutes so that Doomish can smoke a cigarette. 

According to sources, the parents were surprised by the visit, the family saw their son early in the morning after they noticed an unused bedroom door suspiciously closed. 

The parents kept mentioning to the estranged son about the changes that have been done in his apartment during his absence.

“You should go and see your apartment, you will not believe it,” said the mother.

The parents went on to describe every little change and every thing they fixed they during the past four months. 

Sleep deprived and jet lagged Doomish responded, “Not now, i will check it later when i am rested.” 

According to the neighbours, the news reporter arrived at his apartment shortly after noon, “He was distraught and aloof, said the diabetic father living next door. 

“The house is neat, clean and well organised,” said Doomish, the reporter went on to describe his feelings, “The house was cold and desolate, there was no evidence that I ever lived here for 13 years.”

The news reporter spent his vacation saddened by what he felt and saw, as well as other problems that he encountered his visit.

The estranged son encountered several  problems and got occupied in fixing them and missed his flight back to the UAE

Doomish was stranded in queen Alia airport until he manged to get onboard the next flight.

“I missed my flight, I lost track of time, I arrived back to the UAE on the next flight, they were one of the worst days of life,” he said.

My words: 

I have been sad, lost, borderline depressed!
I came back to jordan for a 3 day visit, it’s been few months since I last was here.

For 13 years I had a silent empire, a shelter, haven, a sanctuary that I called my home. 

 A few friends of mine even called it home.

I have it no more.

My parents fixed it up, cleaned it, even slept in it.

When my brother picked me up from the airport, he asked me if I want to sleep at my home or at my parents, I told him to take me to my parents. 

 The next day, they told me what they have fixed/done in my apartment, and begged me to go see it, I refused, something kept telling me not to go.

Well,  I went.
The house was neat, clean and well organized.
It was cold. Lacks my spirit, lacks my identity, I was furious, I was sad mad and I even dropped a couple of tears.

My home was not mine anymore.
I left in a hurry, because I didn’t want to cry.

I spent the next days in a very bad state of mind, I even missed my flight. God damn I was just waiting to get back to UAE to end this awful vacation.

At this point, I don’t know when and if I will go back to Amman anytime soon.

It was awful.

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3 Comments

  1. haitham

    I liked the two styles, I really did.

    I cannot say I had a similar experience or that I know what u mean/feel. Maybe yr parents were being practical, or it is their way of saying they care about u + they miss u. Maybe, just maybe, they r being parents!

    I am sorry u felt down about all this, it is hard to get yr expectations twisted altered modified that way.

    I will say two things though and Ii hope I am not being harsh or crossing a/any lines:

    1) home, though filled with memories and emotions, is just a collection of things. It is one way to view the “changes” that occurred.

    2) Doomish should start doing serious actions (not thinking, supposedly u r beyond thinking) about smoking. Quitters are winners! As simple and plain as that. U have additional responsibility to DO that now 🙂

    Pleasure to read .. u ; always

    Reply
  2. NOUB

    Hmmmm for someone who has always been deeply attached to their home, it must have been tough. It is interesting though how we define ourselves with our homes and vice versa. Agreed with haitham about parents’ point of view. Hope you feel better now that you have another safe haven to call yours

    Reply
  3. haitham

    I hope u can view it as a continuation process. It is a process for sure, and as NOUB said; u have another haven now, not a replacement rather a continuation 🙂

    Reply

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