I have reconnected with old friends, friends that mean/meant alot to me, the relationships drifted due to the nature of life and my dissociative personality.
I thought it is gona be awkward! not at all, it felt like it was yesterday that we last talked!
Its a beauty to rediscover the gems inside the people you knew, and maybe visa versa 🙂
I felt comfortable sitting with one of them for hours on a pavement after sunset, nothing but cups of coffee and water between us, and years worth of absence to catch up. I spent a long weekend with another friend, i had a doubt that we will bond quite nicely, i was so wrong, the lost years has transformed this friend in a way that kept me in awe! i like to think i changed in a good way myself. The bonding and outings these past weeks are/were amazingly amazing!
I idolize my close friends, i turn a blind eye to the flaws of their personalities, even if sometimes those hurt me, assuming they do the same to me. but now, with reconnecting to old close friends, you start weighing your options, you start putting the flows of your other friendships under the microscope, you might find that not all that glitters is gold. you start seeing that there is no afterglow after the words fade, you start looking for actions and anything tangible, but alas… all of a sudden those friendships take a back seat in a long train.
I hate myself for being so dissociative, i hate the fact that those friends were absent from my life. i hate the fact that i might have put my energy in one or two friendships and left others out.
But no more! few weeks ago, a friend of mine showed me that i was wrong, the core of my relationship with this friend got severely shaken. but from this sad and foreseen incident came this new reckoning.
Sasha & Misha, its been almost 24 hours away from you, i miss you terribly my angelic monkeys, cant wait to be back to you.
Brave, Courageous and bold.
Long live his fame
and long live his glory.
Long may his worthless posts be told